Worked real hard for years to change my ways, forgetting the old me putting aside my natural man then something happens and how easily it is to fall back into the old me. Those doors open again do I walk through them or slam them shut! (Not asking you) One foot on either side already. Only 1 person knows the real me, under all the flaws, imperfections, outward behaviours, bad decisions and terrible mistakes.
Something in me has changed over the years, softened, humbled and grown up. Experience has taught and chastened me, marriage and motherhood made me more than I thought I could ever be. Crossed paths with many for good and bad reasons, a heart that was once so tender and fragile yet closed, life of the party on the outside but inside a mess. Lots of choices I made along my journey have equally been good and bad. I have fought hard to remain steadfast yet here I am at a crossroads in my life MY LIFE! No one elses.
A call to step back into the darkside, a pull towards staying on the path I have firmly strived to remain on. It shouldn't be such a battle to decide.
